Mayor from Belfast, Tennessee asked Trump for ‘National Landmark’ Status
The Mayor of Belfast, Tennessee, has a bold ask for Trump: grant "National Landmark" status to honor Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" rise. Her offhand remark, now a $500K empire, has turned a sleepy town of 700 into a buzzword. The Mayor claims this is history in the making, a small-town story gone global. Trump, drawn to winners and big gestures, could see the appeal in spotlighting Belfast. Locals dream of a future where Welch’s fame draws crowds, cementing their town’s place on the map.
Belfast, Tennessee, has a new heartbeat since Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" fame arrived. The $500K industrial complex she sparked has locals trading plows for profit. Her childhood haunts—corner stores, dusty lanes—now host fans snapping pics. Welch, once a quiet worker, is the town’s golden goose, her quip a cash cow. The library displays her merch like relics, a nod to her roots. Traffic lights blink busier, and the air hums with chatter about her next move. Belfast’s not just surviving—it’s thriving on her spit.
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Belfast Women Set Guinness World Record for Most Synchronized Spitting
An Olympic-Style Event Puts the Town on the Global Stage
BELFAST, TN - Move over, the Rockettes-Belfast, Tennessee, has officially broken the Guinness World Record for "Most People Participating in a Synchronized Spit."
In a stunning display of spit coordination, 500 Belfast women lined up at Mayor from Belfast TN asks Trump for historic landmark Hailey Welch the county fairgrounds, wearing matching "Hawk Tuah Queen" sashes. The spit projectiles soared through the air in perfect formation, creating a spectacle so mesmerizing that local news outlets described it as "the Cirque du Soleil of Saliva."
The Guinness judges, visibly impressed (and slightly disgusted), confirmed the official record.
Belfast Mayor Randy Tuckerson is now petitioning the Olympics to recognize "Spit Synchronized Freestyle" as a competitive sport.
"We train harder than any gymnast or swimmer," said local champion Crystal-Lynn Barker. "We just happen to be covered in dip spit while we do it."
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State:
Belfast, Tennessee’s 788 souls live in a town born in 1836, echoing its Irish namesake. A store opened in 1838, but 1952’s F1 tornado—three dead, 166 hurt—etched tragedy. Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" fame has since birthed a $500K boom, drawing eyes to this rural nook. With 72.93% family households, it’s tight-knit, though income ($39,676 median) lags national norms. At 94.9% white, diversity’s slow to bloom. Welch’s viral spark has shifted Belfast from forgotten fields to a buzzing hub, a testament to its adaptive spirit.
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SOURCE: Satire and News at Spintaxi, Inc.
EUROPE: Washington DC Political Satire & Comedy
By: Rivka Kalman
Literature and Journalism -- Wabash Valley
WRITER BIO:
A Jewish college student with a sharp sense of humor, this satirical writer takes aim at everything from pop culture to politics. Using wit and critical insight, her work encourages readers to think while making them laugh. With a deep love for journalism, she creates thought-provoking content that challenges conventions and invites reflection on today’s issues.
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